Health is Wealth

THE MENTAL HEALTH TIP: DEALING WITH A MEAN GIRL 

Have you ever walked into a room full of women, said, “hello”, and maybe the reply was a few dry “heys’, a stare, or maybe just not even a word at all. Or maybe you’ve experienced being at the bad end of a joke by your “girlfriends” or just having one of those days were you’re feeling extra sensitive towards the female population period. 

We’ve all had at least one of these experiences, maybe some of us more often than others. But what happens when we run into, Regina George, yeah you remember the ultimate mean girl herself. She’s the self entitled, “Queen Bee”, that thinks everybody loves her when in fact everybody… well you can fill in the rest. Now understand this a mean girl has no particular race, size, or education level because in fact there everywhere we go, it might even be you sis! First thing is recognizing where this meanness is coming from because it is actually bullying. When recognizing it, you make yourself aware that, “hey that wasn’t so kind or respectful how she did/talked/ or treated me”. If you are on the receiving end of a mean girl, try to use compassion with her because we don’t know all of her back story. Compassion is being conscious of another person’s suffering or circumstance.  If it’s you then recognize this in yourself. If you are the mean girl think back and ask yourself were you ever bullied and if so could this possibly be why you bully others? Also has anyone ever told you that you are mean? What was your response to it? Did you laugh it off, cuss them out, or did somewhere deep down it sting to hear these words about yourself?  

The second course of action which can be the most challenging is using an effective way to talk or deal with a mean girl. Like I said they are everywhere, in our schools, jobs, maybe even in our friend groups or families. Even though it may be hard remember to be the bigger person. Homegirl might be trying to slice you down with what she says or how she treats you, but remember this, “treat her with kindness”. Kindness is an act of giving somebody something they DON’T deserve. Some helpful tips can be to simply be silent, physically putting distance or time between yourself and that person if possible, and last but not least if you do choose to say something back than make sure it’s a positive rather than a negative. A mean girl can’t understand why you’re taking the high road and being nice to her even though she is giving you every reason not to. I can tell you from personal experience every time I encountered a mean girl somewhere later in life we saw each other again. Of course I remembered how she treated me prior to our meeting again but even years later I still took the high road, being kind to her, still leaving her baffled. Some of them wised up and were nice back to me like nothing had ever happened. But for the others all we can do is have compassion towards them and remember we HAVE the POWER to DECIDE HOW we RESPOND. So remember take the high road when dealing with a mean girl.

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